Assassins Creed and Mass Effect
Whilst I’ve been fighting off the Flu I’ve been barely physically well enough to play two of the console’s most recent and hugely hyped titles. Assassins Creed from Ubisoft, and Mass Effect from RPG giants Bioware. Assassin’s Creed is the result of years of hard work from the development team lead by the gorgeous Jade Raymond, and Mass Effect is a colossal Sci-Fi RPG set in the future. Both titles have been hugely hyped, and yours truly couldn’t wait for them.
Assassin’s Creed arrived with quite a mixed reception. A lot of early reviews gave it average ratings, much to everyones surprise citing it was too repetitive. When it arrived I was blown away. Gorgeous visuals and gameplay, with some slightly repetitive moments I do agree. Well they would be repetitive if gamers went about performing every mission in the same manner, I had no problem with this and took on every mission in a random manner. As a result I completely love the game. Killing people with such randomness has never been more fun!
I sound like Mr.Bean!
I had a nasty touch of the man-flu about a week ago, but I managed to shake it off after a solid week spent at home with nothing but Lemsip and Beechams powder. However on Thursday night on the way home I realised that my eyes were heavy, my voice had changed so I now sound like Stephen Hawking’s on steroids, and my nose was blocked. "Shite", I thought to myself. I’ve just fought off the worst case of man-flu, and now it’s back so quickly to haunt me.
Now you have to realise a few things about me. Firstly, I haven’t seen my doctor since I was 18, I am now 32. He probably assumes that I am dead. Secondly Medicine is a no-no. I don’t touch the stuff, well apart from Paracetamol – mainly because it does nothing to me but put me to sleep. If I should catch a cold, it’ll last about 2-3 days, however this case of the recent man-flu knocked me out hard and now that I sit here typing this with a blocked nose and sore throat, it looks like it wants to finish me off.
So last night after a very rough journey home (nearly got arrested on the bus again), I popped into Boots the Chemist for a LOT of medicine.
The lady behind the counter looked at me. She was hot. I don’t get this, you see if you want to pick up a hot indian girl, forget temples, family meetings (oh god not those), forget weddings too. Go to BOOTS. It seems to be a magnet for hot, young indian girls…I think Deena won’t like me saying this, but then again she’s banned from my house until my flu vanishes 😀
Hottie: “It appears you have some kind of viral infection…your eyes….”
No shit sherlock? It is always reassuring to get such a definitive diagnosis from a medical ‘professional’. I just nodded. Opening my mouth to speak in my correct condition would scare her away should she hear my voice.
Cow Kicks Stupid Kid
A lesson to every dumbass out there, don’t mess with the cows because they’re fighting back. This dopey twerp didn’t see the kick coming so the cow now feasts on bits of his body every single morning for breakfast.
Joke: What happens when you talk to a cow? It goes in one ear, and out the udder!
Possibly the dullest place in town
The Post Office should be a lovely friendly place. A place to drop off a letter to a distant relative, to send a birthday card to a friend, or perhaps to simply send a parcel. Most of the time you will end up being served by an old lady or gentleman who would most likely remind you of your grandparents.
Sadly due to huge cost cutting measures over the years most Post Offices have now insisted on becoming much more than what they originally were. They now sell Insurance, Credit Cards, Personal Loads, Travel Insurance and so much more that it’s enough to make you realise how hard times have hit them.
I had exactly 20 minutes during my lunchtime to send off two parcels – two Xbox 360 titles, which I had sold to some gamers. Whenever I visit this particular Post Office, there is always a queue a mile bloody long extending out into the street – all being served by two cashiers who look like they’ve been spoon-fed lead. Now this is what happens when your once superb Post Office service because a ‘Do it all’ service.
Cow was Tipped tbfh
(11-06) 13:47 PST Manson, Wash. (AP) —
Charles and Linda Everson were driving back to their hotel when their minivan was struck by a falling object — a 600-pound cow. The Eversons were unhurt but the cow, which had fallen off a cliff, had to be euthanized.
The year-old cow fell about 200 feet from the cliff and landed on the hood of the couple’s minivan, causing heavy damage.
You can read more about this story on the San Francisco Chronicles website. Funilly enough Breitbart.tv have a video interview of the couple who were in that poor car at the time!