Recent Movie Round Up!

Awww. Do you want to see a grown man cry? Well, if that be the case, take one to watch Marley & Me. In my case, it was my friend Ayesha taking me to see this film, which I knew I would regret.

The film, loosely based on the book stars Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson as Jennifer and John Grogan – an everyday couple who are on the verge of starting a family. With Jennifer following her ‘life’s rulebook’ to a tee. Her next step in life is to have a child, much to the horror of John who feels that he just isn’t ready for such a step. To ween her off the idea he decides to get her a dog – but not any old dog, oh no. They purchase a lovable puppy and name him Marley. It quickly becomes obvious that this dog is a potential nightmare in the making, as he is hyperactive, eats anything and pretty much drives everyone mad.

The film also heavily focuses on the couple as they raise a family, with John obtaining ever more promising positions at work granting them a valuable opportunity to move homes to a better area. As their family blossoms Marley never changes and remains a constant (see troublemaker) in their family.  With Marley pretty much destroying everything he touches, he remains an integral part of their lives and is essentially their ‘first child’. The film never gets too cute and funny and maintains a serious edge mid-way through the film with the ending being enough to bring grown men and women to tears. Don’t watch this film with make-up on ladies.

Oh dear lord where to begin.

My advice to people who have yet to see it – go and do a good PEE before watching this film. Drinking alcohol beforehand is a no-no, or you’re screwed otherwise. Transformers 2 is so damn long that you’ll end up going to take a leak at least TWICE.

I might as well say this now. If you are a teenager who never saw the original cartoons, on which this film is based then you will love Transformers 2 as you have nothing to base the characters on. I know that my five little neices loved it, despite not knowing a single thing about a Transformer. Those who grew up around the 80’s cartoons will either fall into the ‘It wasn’t bad, but fark me it is too long’ or ‘MEH’ catogories. I fall into the former. Ayesha was so bored that she began playing with her new iPhone 3GS during the Agent Simmon’s “come to my basement” scenes.

Shia LaBeouf fumbles, stumbles and blabbers his way through this sequel, with Megan Fox providing the much needed eye candy. Add in a pointless university roommate who was such a waste of space that I wonder why he was even in the cast, and Agent Simmons returning for the quick fire gags played by John Turturro. Soldiers Tyrese Gibson and Josh Duhamel also reprise their roles as Sergeant Epps and Major Lennox.

Director Micheal Bay piles on the explosions, more explosions, yet bigger explosions, rock explosions, building explosions, cars being blown into the air; then exploding, and even more explosions….oh and robot fights in this sequel, which introduces us to so many characters and transformers that I spent half the film only recognising good and bad transformers by the colours of their eyes. It was a complete mess.

This time round the story makes little sense, and features more plotholes than The Mummy Returns. The characters are equally annoying and the action is repetitive and predictable. There is so much happening at various points in the film that you could pop out for food, return and yet miss very little. The film just never wants to end. Actually sod it; I’m ending this here before I really begin ranting.

Pixar return with the very mismatched family of prehistoric furballed mammals.

Manny the Mammoth and his female (what else?) mate Ellie are about to discover the joys of parenthood as Ellie has one in the ‘oven’ as it were. Sid the Sloth has felt somewhat left out by this and decides to try and adopt a family of his own, instead of finding a female mate. Sid the Saber-toothed Tiger has become somewhat old and tired of his lifestyle and wishes he was a hunter again, away from his ‘family’ and out in the wild.

Sid being as stupid and clumsy as he is manages to come across three unhatched dinosaur eggs, which eventually hatch to reveal T-Rexes who immediately assume Sid is their mother. Of course the real mother eventually finds them and isn’t too pleased. Hilarity then ensues as the real mother takes her newborn infants as well as Sid and runs off to her ‘world’. It turns out that there is an entire lost world beneath the ice, which no one really knew about – until now. The ‘family’ go off in search of Sid and bump into the heroic but crazy weasel Buck, voiced by Simon Pegg. Buck spends his time hunting the big bad of the lost world – a giant, evil carnivore by the name of….Rudy.

Of course there is another attraction to the Ice Age trilogy, and that is Scrat – The Sabertooth Squrrel. Scrat is a bumbling, comical furry creature whose antics would remind most older folk of Wiley Coyote, from the classic 50’s cartoon Road Runner. Scrat happens to be one of the key reasons why people of all ages love the Ice Age trilogy. His mannerisms and failings are hilarious to watch as he goes after that elusive acorn. Hell he even has a 7 minute short film on iTunes that is quite funny. In all the previous Ice Age films, Scrat pretty much appears at random moments when the film’s main plotline gets a bit long in the tooth as it were. It is as if he is introduced just to wake up the audience just as they are tiring of a particularly boring segment of the film.

Ice Age 3 introduces a love interest for our furry friend and chaos ensues. Overall, Ice Age 3 still manages to raise laughs a plenty.

6 Responses to “Recent Movie Round Up!”

  • Scraaaaat!!!

    Hoping to go see this at some point 🙂 Must admit what you’ve written about Transformers 2 is what I was expecting, which is why I went and saw Bruno instead with the wenchy!

    Ayesha – You have a powerful influence over our Darren and have proven it by getting him to go see what is obviously a chick-flick with you. Use your power sparingly and wisely, with great power comes great responsibility, so you must get him to get a tattoo of a pink my little pony preferably on his forehead.

    Anyway am I the only muppet that’s pre-ordered Windows 7 professional around here? or does nobody else have money to burn – it’s a habit you know, once you start paying for a wedding money seems worthless, going to follow Bruno’s example, get my ****hole bleached and go down the docks. Might be able to afford a pre-order of Windows 7 premium too after a few hours biting on an old chair leg.

  • I’ve pre-ordered Windows 7 Pro to, I want the remote desktop option.

    You all need to see Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince!

  • I’d avoid TR2 until it comes out on DVD or Bl0ray for rentals tbh. I feel sorry for those who went to see it at IMAX :mrgreen:

    I ordered Home Premium for £45! Bargain!

  • Still to see Hairy Potter, was going to go this weekend PR but got the future mother in law staying with us from Friday-Mon, torture!!!!!

  • Surely that’s all the more reason to go at the weekend, perhaps rent Monster-In-Law instead, bet she’ll see the funny side!

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