Having second thoughts already
Tomorrow I’ll be off on the fourth booze cruise trip to France with my work pals. Our main objective? To raid the Calais hypermarkets of booze, bring booze back to the UK and drink or sell most of it for something called MONIES. Well that’s what typically happens, but to be honest this is a great chance to grab some Xmas gifts too, which is why I am going. I’ve still got bloody booze left over from our last cruise in March this year!
This cruise isn’t organised by me this time so I’m wondering how things will work out. I keep having second thoughts because I really don’t need to go - and whenever we do go, the weather is ALWAYS awful. Last time we went there, we ended up lost, then came the rain and hailstones and then we stumbled into the French version of The Burbs! Given that I have spent a huge amount of cash recently on clothes and gadgets I have to ask myself is there any point in going? I’m taking my new rather expensive Fuji 6500 camera with me, I’m not sure why because the weather will be poor as mentioned.
Ah well. So Deena and I, along with brat Ayesha leave on a coach tomorrow at 07:00 bound for Dover. We then cross the channel in a P&O ferry. The girls will no doubt be sick throughout the entire journey so I will be free to roam Duty Free for goods. We then hit a couple of supermarkets for booze, then a hypermarket for food, then hit Boulogne and a few nearby towns for a few hours before heading home. I don’t want to go, I want to play Team Fortress 2 dammit!
Off to France & Italy for a bit
Wow, it has been a busy week for me. I’m off on holiday from tomorrow night visiting France for a day, which happens to be a trip from work to shop for lotsa booze! The stuff is dirt cheap in Calais, so we go there around three times a year to stock up on the stuff. Then on Sunday night, my girlfriend and I head off to Italy, Venice for a week. I am really looking forward to it now, except as I write this I have realised that I don’t really fare well on ferries - I hate bumpy rides! Venice has been one of my dream destinations for years now.
Yesterday I had a major shock at work when I was called to the director’s office. I thought I was going to get in trouble for taking too much time off from work lately, but instead he had called me in to give me advance notice of a promotion beginning on April 2nd…not the best of dates mind you…
I was totally bricking myself and then knocked sideways as I heard the news that they had planned this for months. I am not entirely sure what my new position entails just yet but it is basically design work for military hardware as I have become increasingly versed in this area over the years. I am excited and nervous, well mainly nervous because I am afraid of failure from doing a job I’ve never done. Thankfully, the people who I will be working alongside have been very welcoming towards me joining their ranks so it’s not all bad. I’ll be buggered if I am wearing a suit to work though - I’m not that type!
I predict a riot!
Woo, on the 23rd of March, myself, Ayesha and Deena hop off to France to join my company on the first of our yearly trips to France, organised for the first time by yours truly. This will be rather comical, as I’ve booked two coaches instead of the usual one due to high demand. I’ve been stressing out a lot over this trip mainly because at one point we had more people coming then the coaches could handle! Luckily, some families dropped out so it’s all cool.
I am really looking forward to this trip now, as events on the last trip were hilarious as the coach broke down on the way back to London, and everyone ended up drunk as we all got bored and began to consume the booze that we had only just purchased. Ayesha managed to cause chaos by dropping her handbag that had mini bottles of some sort of booze. Cue utter madness as everyone ended up hopping around the coach trying not to step on them as she ran riot trying to grab as many as possible! 
This time round we seem to have a coach load of raving mad teens and their parents so things should be quite amusing! Hey Ayesha, you might pull! 
I hope that the weather will be decent for once as this isn’t the best time to really visit, but we need ze booze for ze summer!
We return home (hopefully!) just after midnight, and then on the next day Deena and me are off to Venice, Italy! Never been there, always wanted to go there and I’ve developed a serious affection for Italian food lately! We will take a flight directly to the International "Marco Polo" Airport, and then stay at the 4 star Hotel Alexander just outside Venice for a few days before heading back! Ahh the luxury of abusing my position at work continues
I wash not pished
I spent most of my weekend in France this weekend. My last trip was in March which ended up in a drunken singing session on the coach as we returned to the Uk. This booze cruise trip was also from work, and we could invite whoever we wanted. I was pestered into taking my deranged 19yr old half cousin Ayesha with me. I knew I’d regret doing it as I can’t even keep her under control but she came down from Manchester for the weekend so she could play with Elmo!. She was sad enough to take Elmo on the coach with us which made him quite popular with the other 3yr olds…
We set off for Dover at 04:00 on Saturday morning. We reached Dover very quickly, caught our SeaFrance ferry and starting crossing the channel. Last time we did this, the sea was nice and calm, this time however it felt like I was in a canoe in the middle of the pacific! The weather in France, Calais was horrid (again), but we were here for ze booze! Four hypermarkets were visited, and lots of booze purchased! I ended up spending just over £250 on a whole load of assorted drinks, while Ayesha tried to chat up a young guy at the customer service desk. I think he didn’t understand a word she was babbling on about, he certainly looked puzzled.
We visited Boulogne after that for 2hrs but it was miserable. The weather was dull and almost everyone was too tired to even get out of the coach after having run around hypermarkets for a solid 3 hours or so. Coming back to the Uk was fun. At passport control, I tried to convince them that Ayesha was an illegal lol, they actually told her to stand to one side for a few minutes until she eventually found her passport! 
The coach broke down just 30mins after leaving Dover. While the driver and his assistants tried to sort the issue out, they were unaware that most of us had sneaked out the side of the coach and grabbed as much booze as we could from our personal purchases! Bwahaha. Once again, half the people on the coach were totally smashed and drunk somewhat silly as we sang every Robbie Williams, Westlife and thankfully Oasis tracks that the driver had put on just to shut us up. Good luck explaining to your mum why your jeans stink of Jack Daniels & Coke Ayesha
I had a lovely time, partially marred by the weather but I’m safe and happy knowing that I’ve got enough booze to give friends and family for Xmas now. Mmm Baileys Truffles!
They’ll love me!
I’ve been less then vocal lately on this blog, mainly because of the two brilliant Xbox 360 games in my last post below but also because I’ve been preparing to fly off to Australia on a work business trip to meet some engineers in 24hrs. I’ve been rather nervous about the whole thing really. I’m not a frequent flyer, hell the last time I was on a plane was years ago. Having seen Snakes On A Plane over the weekend hasn’t helped matters either… Mark you muppet, bad choice of film!
I’ll be staying in Queensland, Brisbane for a couple of days, so I doubt I’ll get to do hardly any sightseeing as I’ll be rather busy. I’ve always wanted to visit Oz but I wish that circumstances were a bit different on this occasion. I’ve got some Uk friends at Bond Uni on the southeastern end of Queensland so I’ll staying a night there too. Knowing my luck I’ll end up lost in the Northern flippin territory with the evil crocs! I can’t believe I’m being sent all the way over there just to discuss some work related matters with some acoustic engineers though, it just doesn’t feel right. Anyway talk about being alucky one….although if I meet
Samuel L. Jackson on that plane I’m jumping right the **** off.
Quick lowdown on what happened (more to come when I’m actually sober)
1. Missed the 08:20 ferry bound for Calais, ended up getting on the 09:15 one.
2. Booze trip to 3 hypermarkets was awesome and much monies was spent.
3. Tasmin thought it’d be cool to feed two seagulls with a dead fish….they weren’t impressed.
4. Coach was too heavy, so the driver says "the coach is lopsided, so you’ll all need to drink some of the booze to lighten up the coach…"
5. Everyone got so drunk that we all thought we were back in England. For a solid hour going from Calais to Bologne we sang every 60’s song on the ‘Best of the 60’s CD’ that the driver had.
6. After No.4, we then hassled every shopkeeper in Bologne by paying for our food with English money even though they wanted Euro’s.
7. Snow Dogs seemed to be the most hilarious film in the world while intoxicated.
8. Within an hour of reaching Bologne it begain raining like crap. Then the fog came in and it was like the end of the world as the coach driver couldn’t see 5 feet in front of him.
9. Tasmin started crying thinking she’d die before hitting 30 because of No.8.
10. Finally reached home! 1hr 30mins later after unloading the coach of booze did I manage to get all my drinks into the car. Yay!
In other news, the first batch of games for my Xbox 360 have kept me busy for roughly a week so far. Fight Night 3 is so sodding good, that Ghost Recon aka GRAW has hardly had a look in. Too many games on the way and no time for them, it sucks!
France trip which was meant to begin 8th March has been delayed till later this month - nerf. Life is great! Sort of, until I buggered things up with lovely Tasmin by not agreeing to go to a restaurant with her. Hey, not my fault I don’t like Thai food that much! So I shall apologise here and say that I am er sorry and we can go out wherever…just not the london eye *grumble*
Lastly, while most of the Uk has fun in the snow, I ask one simple question - Where the hell is the snow in London I ask!? Over this weekend we’ve had clear blue skies and a warm breeze!
Managed to charm my way into a nice trip to France next month in March, which is being taken care of by my workplace. Beware Frogs Legs! Kainzy is coming, armed with his trusty camera! Besides, France has stunning ladies and it’d be nice to go back there since the cuisine is just godly!
Should point out that Paris was so sodding cold, that I managed to pick up flu symptoms while there, my first in a good few years. Being as accident prone as one could be I managed to slip and land arse first on the ground as I got off the tour bus. I later got snowballed to death by Anita and Taz as I tried to read a street map, oh and a dog almost took a keen liking to my leg - I shall not say anymore in regards to that.
